'Twas the night before surgery

'Twas the night before surgery, and all through the land, not a creature was stirring not even to play rock band. The bags were all packed by the door with great care, all in great hopes that Ted soon would be fair. I was all nestled up, on the couch where I hid, while I drooled on myself drugged up from dilaudid. My mom in her nightgown, my dad in his hanes, had just settled down for a long cribbage game.  When out of the living room there arose such a clatter, my mom dashed to the door and yelled "WHATS THE MATTER?!" There I lay in a pool of my drool, had fallen off the couch, in an attempt to be cool. When the next morning came, we made a great sprint, and arrived at pre-op just in the nick! Question upon question, they came out like mad: allergies, alcohol, tobacco, NSAID!? After finishing it all, and doing so quick- it was time for surgery, it happens that quick! On Doctor, On nurse, on anesthia too, "we'll knock you out, just Count backwards from two!"  When you wake up you wont know whats the matter, morphine and versed, you'll really like the latter!  So when you get done you'll be sore and quiet tired, but free you will be from a tumor that got fatter.  Dont worry, dont fret, the surgery can be quiet crass, but ultimately you'll be free from that pain in the ass!!
Note to self- trying to rhyme while drugged up on pain drugs- HUGE challenge. See you all after surgery!