Being Far Away

So I guess the title means more than just the literal fact that Matt and I are doing the long distance thing. Lately Ive just felt so disconnected and discontent with just about every aspect of my life. I'm hating school currently (and Yes, for all you optimists there are less than 30 days left), home life has been sorta, "rough" lately, and Army, well.. I'm hardly ever there before of school, but since Im just frustrated in general it gets lumped in, and therefore Im frustrated with it too. Then theres the tumor, which is just sorta depressing, and all in all, I just feel Disconnected. I keep looking back to Spring Break, and the time I spent with Matt in California and wishing I could go back to that (in a more permanent fashion)... but then the "realistic Helen" pops in and reminds me that this is all just a phase. I know God has lead me down this path, and brought Matt and I together, however far apart we may be, and I need to have faith, persevere and stay the course. WAY easier said than done. But I guess most things in life are that way. Mostly I think I just miss my optimism. I'm a firm believer that life is what you make of it, and that people are about as happy as they make up there minds to be (great quote from Honest Abe)  but lately that has just been impossible it seems. Today though, I was able to get some frustration out (admittedly it involved some screaming and throwing, and smashing a paint brush roller, but it made me feel better, so maybe shamefully it was therapeutic.)  So hopefully from here I can move on and continue on with life and be more positive.